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Alien Vs. Predator World Series for Met Fans

Posted By Mark Reichman On Oct 28 2009 @ 1:29 am In New York Mets | 3 Comments

This nightmare season for the New York Mets now has the ultimate nightmare ending.   Yankees-Phillies World Series.  Ugh, those words send a shiver of disgust down my spine.  This dismal battle of the Mets arch-rivals is enough to make most Met fans want to crawl under a rock.  The temptation is there to sit this one out, to boycott the Series, to say, with two dreaded participants, there can be no winner for me. But now is the time to rally, Met fans, in this our darkest hour, to show your co-workers, friends, and family how much you love the Mets by….(please sit down before reading this) pulling for the Philadelphia Phillies with all you got.

At first I thought I’d be rooting for injuries to occur, but that seemed mean so I revised it to rooting for a Rick Ankiel-like mental breakdown for all the pitchers involved.  Also karmic-ly questionable.  Then it occurred to me someone has got to win and that creates the possibility that the other team might get humiliated in the process.    I would like to see the Yankees get served a big fat slice of humble pie in a seven game series in which both teams have a lot of failures but the Yankees choke it away in the end.

Pulling for the Phillies is, to me, the ultimate act of love as a Met fan.  It shows the world that between the Mets and Yankees there is a deep-seeded battle for respect and identity as a New Yorker.  Deeper than divisional rivalry.  I want the Yankees to lose so badly that I would even root for the hated Phillies.  I always said I could only root for the Phillies if they ever played the Yankees in the World Series, and now that day of reckoning has come.

To say that you can’t root for either team is to admit inferiority, to slink away from the championship table with your tail between your legs, cowering, in fear of the fight between Alien and Predator.  Show your pride by taking sides Met fans, and delighting in the fact that at least its guaranteed that one arch enemy is going down.

Today's New York Post cemented my pro-Phillies decision.  In case you missed it the front page featured a photo-shopped picture of Phillie Shane Victorino wearing a mini skirt.  Inside the newsapaper, journalistic integrity continued to take a backseat to regionalistic snobbery. From page 9:

Philly: Scrapple and a Soft Pretzel
New York: Froie gras at the Four Seasons

Philly: The road company of “Cats” at the Walnut St. Theater (again!)
New York: “Hamlet” on Broadway

I'm a proud New Yorker but I just don't subscribe to this kind of sneering, egotistical, better-than-thou, front-running, bandwagon-jumping attitude which (I'm sorry) the Yankees and their fans embrace!  I travel to other places in the world and tell people I'm from New York and I have to explain I don't have that attitude….and damn it, I'm a Mets fans and I dislike the Yankees more than you!

If my logic hasn’t convinced you, check out my fantasy of how I’d like to see the World Series end:
Game 7 at Yankee stadium.  The Phillies, after losing the first three games have rallied back to win games 4, 5 and 6 by scores of 22-7, 19-0 and 11-1 respectivley.  In Game 7 Ryan Howard hits an unfathomable five home runs in a 33-3 smackdown, destroying Reggie Jackson's beloved single game World Series record.  It gets so bad at the end that the beleaguered Joba Chamberlain is the only arm available in the pen and is mercilessly slapped around for 11 runs in 2/3 of an inning.  With the Yankees bullpen completely expended and Joba melting down and unable to get out of the inning, Johnny Damon is brought in to pitch and evenutally records the last out of the game after allowing another 4 runs. Philly makes a Ryan Howard candy bar.

GO PHILLIES!!!!!! (Enjoy my love now because you'll hopefully never have it again).

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