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Habs Player Report Cards

Posted By Corey Krakower On Nov 24 2010 @ 1:18 am In Montreal Canadiens | 1 Comment

The NHL season has hit the one-quarter mark; and the Montreal Canadiens stand atop the Northeast division with a record of `13-7-1 through 21 games played. Backed by exceptional goaltending, efficient special teams and goal scoring contributions from some unexpected players; the Habs have been one of the best teams in the Eastern Coneference and have shown that they can compete with any team on any given day. It is at this point in the season that coaches and general managers evaluate all of their players in an attempt to determine their team strengths and weaknesses, and identify areas that could use upgrades via trade.

Below is what some of Jacques Martin’s and Pierre Gauthier’s player evaluations look like.

Player: Carey Price

The Positive: Has kept the Habs in almost every single game this year

The Negative: The only thing that came up negative for Carey Price is a handful of pregnancy tests.

Player: Brian Gionta

The Positive: Works hard every night, contributes even when he’s not scoring.

The Negative: Can’t read French, although neither could Jacques Demers.

Player: Lars Eller

The Positive: Jacques Martin refuses to play him so that no one can see how badly the Habs got screwed in the Halak trade.

The Negative: Will soon be nicknamed AH-Eller

Player: PK Subban

The Positive: Montreal’s best D prospect since Andrei Markov

The Negative: Mike Richards said PK doesn’t respect other players. When David Booth awakens from his coma, we’ll be sure to ask him who is more respectful between the 2.

Player: Jeff Halpern

The Positive: With 13 points in 21 games, he is the Canadiens’ most pleasant surprise right now and best bang for the buck.

The Negative: Halpern, a Jew, will be uncomfortable when the time comes for him to be matched up against Leafs’ top prospect Nazem Kadri, whose nickname is “Nazi” (that’s actually his nickname).

Player: Andrei Kostitsyn

The Positive: When he has been good, he’s shown that he can be an effective top 6 forward

The Negative: With 1 goal in his last 12 games, his game is receding faster than his hairline.

Player: Maxim Lapierre

The Positive: Is on pace to hit career highs in goals, shots and penalty minutes.

The Negative: If those benchmarks are like opposing players, he will only hit them when there is a referee very close by.

Player: Hal Gill

The Positive: Montreal has a phenomenal PK this year, in large part due to Hal Gill and his infamous long stick.

The Negative: What do Hal Gill and the weather in Montreal have in common? Being -4 in November is considered progress.

Player: Scott Gomez

The Positive: Is very close to recording the “Scott Gomez Hat Trick”; which is 3 goals in 2 months.

The Negative: To quote the movie Jaws – “we’re gonna need a bigger blog.”

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