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Across the Pond, distance doesn’t make the heart grow fonder…
Posted By Gabe Hidalgo On Dec 30 2010 @ 8:15 pm In New York | No Comments
So, I am celebrating Christmas and New Year’s in Jolly Ole’ London. That’s right, the United Kingdom, England, the birthplace of the Magna Carta and Bangers & Mash (not in that order). The creative geniuses who launched the Beatles, Benny Hill and Monty Python are now all around me. Although I am not in the USA, I am always thinking of the NYC Sports Scene…I can’t help it…over here they are talking about Cricket (think Baseball with a flat paddle for a bat) and Rugby (think Football with no Pads) or football (not American football, but soccer). So what do we have to review, as they say here in the UK…A BLOODY LOT!
After Manning’s supposed meeting with the team where he called out his team to play like men, Eli throws four interceptions in Green Bay. In the worst possible moment, Eli spit the bit and basically gave the game to the Packers. Along with the game, the Packers now control their own destiny, while the Giants do not. If the Packers beat the Bears this week…the Giants are basically toast. How did this happen? How could a defense that looked like it was ALL-PRO all of a sudden look like NO-SHOW? In the Philly game, a critical fumble by a wide receiver coaxed the eagles out of their slumber and led to Philly’s amazing disastrous comeback along with a moment to live in infamy…call it “the Punt return”. DeSean Jackson erases “the Fumble” and creates his own Philly miracle by returning a punt with no time left to WIN THE GAME!
The Green Bay game was the knock-out punch. Will the coach lose his job? Will Bill Cowher be getting a call from the Mara Family to rescue the Giants? Will Screaming Tom Coughlin be put out to pasture? I guess all that will be answered in about two weeks…
In trying to come up with a snazzy title for this section, I kept laughing at what I ultimately chose as the heading. How could losing feel like winning? Well, let see. The Jets go into Chicago and lose a thriller 38-34. BUT, Mark Sanchez had the offense firing well (they score 27 points and the Defense scored a TD on a INT). The running game under Shonn Greene looks great, Dustin Keller, yeah you know, our TE, looked good. How did they lose? Well, in the third quarter, someone forgot to tell the Jets that they were supposed to cover their receivers….and POW….Chicago scores 21 points. It was insane to watch, Jay Cutler threw without any PRESSURE, thanks to our no rush defensive line, and hit his WR’s with some pretty touchdowns.
So the Jets lost, now they have to win against Buffalo for a chance for the playoffs….NOPE!!! Seems the Jacksonville Jaguars owed the Jets a gift and they paid up by losing to the Washing Redskins in Overtime. SOOOOOOO…while the Jets Offense looks to be humming, the Jets are in the Playoffs and this weekend’s game looks to be a warmup….well not so fast! It’s never that easy.
The Defense looked horrible. The secondary was lit up and it look like they were a JV team practicing against varsity. If Rex Ryan can’t tighten up this defense, the Jets will probably escape KC with a playoff win but will get destroyed by the Patriots. if you thought 45-3 was ugly, how is it going to look when the Pats hang a 60 spot on the Jets. Yes, that is how bad the Defense is. They should use this upcoming Buffalo game to fix the defense and use the KC game to tighten it up…because if not, the Hard Knocks show will end in Foxborough.
Yanks – Lost out on Cliff Lee and now don’t have to many viable options left to improve their starting pitching. Hmm, that sucks for them but they have bushloads of money so they will probably pick something up at midseason from a team looking to offload some salary.
Mets – Cheap…Cheap…Cheap… That is the sound the Wilpons make. To expect any major moves this winter is to expect the Sanitation trucks to plow your outer borough streets while the snow is still falling. Good luck with that.
All I expect is a few minor league moves at best and at the very least a manager who will be passionate about the team. Manuel was a nice guy but he wasn’t a fire and brimstone guy…the Mets need a good kick in the pants.
Check out our Hockey and basketball bloggers for insight. Being across the pond, its hard to follow anything, let alone the third and fourth most popular sports in America. I defer to our experts below:
Chips = French Fries
Crisps = American Potato Chips/Dorito Chips/etc.
Bangers = Sausage
Mash = Mashed potatoes
Nappies = Diapers
Still = Tap Water
Smirnoff = Vodka they prefer (eek…Try some Grey Goose, Belvedere or Ciroc Coconut)
The French = People always looking for help. In context “That bloke needed me to French his car. Too bad I didn’t carry jumpers (jumper cables).” or ” Can you believe that the Greeks are complaining because of all the EU Frenching?”
Benny Hill = Bob Hope
The Beatles = Elvis
Queen Elizabeth = Lindsay Lohan (hahahaha, ok, what I mean is that they follow the Queen’s every move like the NY Post/NY Daily News follows Lindsay’s every screw up…)
The English are extremely polite and jolly people. They are quick to provide help with directions and will always crack a smile. I have enjoyed the English hospitality and the English sense of humor. The only thing is that I’m expected to pay 50% more for things here in the UK than in the states. Whopper in USA…$2.99 Whopper Royale in UK……$4.50. Also, be aware that pubs serve their beers warm…so if you are looking for a tall frosty one, you should go to a SCANDINAVIAN country…the Irish and the English like their Guinness warm and thick. However, I was able to introduce my wife to the joys of Magners Cider!
So, one day, my wife, my kids and I are coming back to our hotel room riding comfortably on the Tube (the underground Subway) when I notice this disgusting older bastard who sits across from my youngest child and whips out his cell phone. Does he think that I am not observant enough to know that he is positioning his cell phone to take a picture? I quickly shield my child’s face with a large paper folder that housed a picture we just took at the London Eye (a great circular Ferris wheel that moves slowly allowing you to take in all the sites in London) and I waited till he put the phone away. As he puts his phone in his pocket, he looks at my daughter and then looks at me. I give him my meanest DEATH stare and he makes pretend that he is about to go to sleep. We get out at our station, he follows us out. I told my wife and kids to wait on the platform…the old bastard slinks on out an exit ramp. I told my wife that if that old bastard is upstairs waiting by the exit on the street level, she better get me out of the Hoosegow because I am going to kick his old English ass. Luckily for him and me, he was not there and there was no need for the bobbies. But, I will say this, to all Dads and Moms that may read this…Do not allow anyone to open up a camera phone near your child, their are a lot of crazy possible pedophiles who will take your child’s picture and distribute it through the web. Recently, the FBI ran a sting on a pedophile ring with links world wide that were posting indecent and innocent photos of children online. Also, I would caution on posting your child’s photographs on Facebook. Facebook is great for maintaining ties with friends but when you post pictures of your children, they are usually there forever. Google “caches” websites and their pictures so a simple Google search can bring up a picture you had momentarily posted and taken down. Don’t be a victim. For safety’s sake, take down your child’s picture you may have posted online because in the wrong hands it could lead to tragedy. I apologize if this posting sounded too serious but this is a serious matter and our children’s safety should be our most paramount concern. Till next week…Be vigilant!
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